Stupid pound

Have you glanced at my weight loss progress thingy over there in the right hand column and wondered if I forgot to update it? (And yes, thingy is the technical term.) Like for the last month? Well, I haven't forgotten. It seems those last 5 pounds are gonna take as long as the first 42. When they say the last 5 lbs are the hardest, they're not lying!

A few weeks ago, I got within a pound of my goal. One fricken little pound. I have a name for that pound but I try to keep this blog g-rated...and the name clearly is not. Then the feared dragon settled in for an extended two week stay. Working out was difficult with the dragon. I went for a couple of stroller walks with Ian but couldn't even breathe well during that mild exertion. The dragon finally flew the coup and I vowed to return to my work out schedule. In some cosmic joke, the dragon was exchanged for cramps. (Sorry men. Read on, that's the worst it gets.)

On top of not working out, I've begun to revert back to some bad habits. Healthier...but still bad. BWL (Before Weight Loss), I would come home and attend to a million things other than eating dinner. After Ian was in bed, I would scarf down whatever was handy. That meant eating crap after 8:30pm. DWL (During Weight Loss), I never ate past 8pm. And I negotiated with Jeff to have a half hour to make & eat dinner as soon as I got home from work. Recently however, I've started postponing dinner in favor of playing with Ian or making a batch of food for Ian or...[fill in blank with a million different things]. And even if I manage to make and eat dinner, I am back to snacking after 8pm. Sure, I'm snacking on baked chips or soy pudding but it's still snacking. And I'm not even monitoring the portion size. I just grab a bag of something salty and dig in. Holy badness! That's like the stupidest thing I could do, I know! But I still do it.

Despite these horrible habits, I'm not gaining (much) but I'm definitely not losing either. It's time to get back on the wagon. And since repeating that to myself every morning out of late-night-binging-guilt doesn't seem to be doing the trick, I will instead reveal it all to you dear internet friendz. Hopefully that will help. I shall start with three small steps for the next 24 hours...

I will make and eat a satisfying and sensible dinner tonight.
I will not snack after 8pm tonight.
I will work out tomorrow morning.

But we are having my most favorite raspberry chocolate fudge cake from the Dessert Tray in like 8 minutes. And I will have a piece. A small piece.

Moderation not starvation, that's what I say. Even though moderation is a slippery slope for me. Ugh. I'll get back on the wagon after the cake. Promise.